Nov
28

Black Friday with the Yankees

By

I could really use a new couch.

Ah, Black Friday. Nothing beats waking up early and wading through a crowded store stuffed with insanely cut-throat bargain-seekers. Luckily, in this wired day and age, we have the Internet for all of our shopping needs, and nothing beats MLB.com’s shop for things you don’t need and never knew existed.

So in the spirit of Black Friday, let’s take a whimsical look at some of the — for lack of a better word — stuff that you can buy decked out in Yankee memorabilia.

In the spirit of the season, let’s start with these slightly menacing snowmen ornaments. Apparently, psychotic snowmen are Yankee fans. The nutcracker is another holiday classic, and he too is a Yankee fan. I guess the production company couldn’t get the rights to use George Steinbrenner circa 1977 for the face. For the Mo worshipers among us, it’s now possible to add Mo’s visage to your Christmas tree in the form of an ornament four-pack. What could be more comforting than Mariano watching over your family? I’m digging the Joba Chamberlain action figure ornament too, but I’m not sure what’s going on here.

Moving into the realm of slightly creepy Yankee gifts, we have face clocks. Doesn’t everyone want Hideki Matsui and his handsome mug running the bases intently around their clock? Or how about Johnny Damon’s smiling face staring out into the living room? His eyes will follow your every move.

No home is complete without the Chien-Ming Wang model truck or the vinyl, all-black figurine of Alex Rodriguez. At least, I think that’s Alex Rodriguez. It looks more like a cartoon version of The Phantom in a baseball uniform than it does A-Rod.

From the “Things You Never Thought You Needed” category comes this stylish Yankee cutting board. Perhaps, you’d rather dress your pet in a Yankee varsity jacket or outfit your Yankee pool table with a pinstriped billiards lamp. Maybe you want a nearly three-foot-long megaticket, a larger-than-life reproduction of a seminal Yankee ticket. Does anyone buy this stuff?

Personally, I like the wooden Yankee bedframe. This product only comes in Twin size. I guess the manufacturers figure that if someone’s sleeping in it, they won’t need to worry about sharing the bed any time soon.

Finally, we end with my personal favorites: a Yankee hat optical mouse, a portable grill shaped like a keg and the portable Yankee refrigerator. What more could anyone want besides life, decorated with that ever-present interlocking NY?

Categories : Whimsy

11 Comments»

  1. Bill R says:

    I personally would LOVE the couch if I had a MAN room! too bad i’m poor.

  2. [...] on the other coast we’ve got a humorous look at Black Friday with the Yankees (as in the New York Yankees and Baseball). Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)Black [...]

  3. sevrox says:

    That Arod black figurine is fuh-fuh-fuh-freaky looking – lol at “The Phantom” description. The “not sure what’s going on over here” team celebration ornament is truly a must-have. I think that’s Tino and Bernie and maybe Jeter, but Jeter appears to be a bit too short for accurate representation.

    I’ll sit in TGIF or Bennigans or “name your industrial strength mall pub” today and let the Real Shoppers have at it.

    Happy Holidays.

  4. Steve says:

    That Johnny Damon clock is disturbing. Its like he’s looking right at me. *shivers*

  5. Steve says:

    OK, that Yankee hat mouse is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen. I have to have one, and I’m not sure I can wait till Christmas.

  6. Jeff G says:

    That bed frame is amazing… King size please. Could you imagine how turned on a girl would get to be able to kick it in that bed… especially after you got things heated up on the couch? Off the charts. Styling.

  7. Mike Pop says:

    Links, links, and links

  8. SAMIAMSPORTS says:

    LMFAO!!!! I really laughed hard at this post ….
    Truth, I want the mouse , BBQ, Bedframe,and fridge. but all that other stuff is either creepy or frightning

  9. DonnieBaseballHallofFame says:

    If the mouse is good quality I would take it as a free bee. Most of that other stuff is terrible. I seriously question when I see stuff like this if the people who license the rights to use the logos ever make their money back. Like you have to be shooting for Yanks, Sox, Cubbies, Dodgers to make your money when you do a MLB team licensing deal anyway. This is like dollar store MLB stuff.

    I also seem to notice a ton of Yankees stuff that looks like Cowboys stuff with a Yanks logo instead. The navy color seems to always be a mix of the real navy blue and the Yankee stadium blue color. The grey is ALWAYS too light.

    I like the Yankees a whole lot but will never have a Yankees keg style mini BBQ rig. Now if I was a kiddie I might want a Yanks bedframe or something though. Those clocks look like some 22 year old dork’s myspace page layout. Horrid.

  10. Greg C says:

    Where’s the link to the couch?

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