May
04

Livin’ large with AJ Burnett

By Mike Axisa

Life is good when you’ve banked over $38M in your career and have a contract in place guaranteeing you another $82.5M despite having a 110 OPS+ ERA+, zero All-Star appearances and zero Cy Young votes. So what do you do with all that cash? Why have a ridicuously awesome home theatre custom built in your house of course. Electronic House toured AJ Burnett’s theatre, and let’s just say it’s plush. Despite all the cool stuff he had installed, Electronic House only gave Burnett’s set-up the Bronze Medal in the $250k+ category. For shame. (h/t Deadspin)

Posted on Monday, May 4th, 2009 at 11:30 am in Asides.

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35 Comments »

Slugger27 says:

“despite having a 110 OPS+ ERA+”

D’oh. Fixed, thanks.

 
 
Slugger27 says:

and i can totally see aj being a “300″ fan… that movie has burnett written all over it

Dude that movies got ME written all over it.

“300″ = huge steaming pile of crap

You forget, for me this movie involves looking at really, really fucking hot guys for nigh on 3 hours…

steve (different one) says:

i especially enjoyed Shelley Duncan as the hunchback

 

Fair enough.

“300″ for Rebecca = Watching a Redskins-Lions preseason game live at FedEx Field (for the Redskins Cheerleaders, of course) for me

 
 

And, while we’re on the topic of movies, in case anyone missed my recent Twitter and Facebook message:

Dear G.I. Joe Movie: Please do not suck as bad as the Transformer Movie sucked (which was a lot).

Sincerely,
My Childhood.

UWS says:

Uhhh, yeah. Good luck with that.

I don’t know, man… the Transformers movie was a traveshamockery. All the G.I. Joe movie has to do is just be kinda shitty but partially enjoyable and it wins by default.

I just saw a preview for G.I. Joe for the first time. It looks like they just filmed an action movie and slapped the G.I. Joe name on it for nostalgia marketing.

When I’m through, scuzzbucket, they’re gonna scrape you off the walls with a squeegee!

(Comments wont nest below this level)
 
steve (different one) says:

yeah, i didn’t really get the Transformers movie. wasn’t the idea with the transformers that they would “transform” from one thing to another?

what did that happen, like once in the whole movie with bumblebee?

no complaints with the female lead however.

(Comments wont nest below this level)

Don’t get me started.

Let me get this straight: there’s this cube that’s the key to everything, and we need to get it out from this bunker in the middle of the desert and airlift it somewhere.

But, instead of just flying the chopper to the desert and putting the cube on the chopper, we’re going to DRIVE the cube to the middle of a nearby CROWDED, URBANIZED CENTER OF HUMAN POPULATION so that we can take it up to the top of a huge skyscraper that’s conveniently abandoned for no explicable reason and entrust some human kid with the task of taking the cube to the top of this building to get it on a chopper.

WE CAN’T JUST PUT THE FUCKING CUBE ON THE FUCKING CHOPPER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT, WE HAVE TO CREATE THIS ELABORATE CHAIN OF EVENTS WHICH MAKES OUR OBJECTIVE INCALCULABLY MORE DIFFICULT AND EXPOSES THOUSANDS OF HUMAN LIVES TO DANGER AS COLLATERAL DAMAGE FROM THESE GIGANTIC HUMAN-KILLING FUTURISTIC ROBOTS.

That makes sense.

Michael Bay blows.

Oh, and:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IXCK1EyP4s

 
Matt ACTY says:

Michael Bay blows.

:)

 
 
 
 
Matt ACTY says:

If I had facebook/twitter, mine would say something along the same lines, only for the new Terminator movie. I’ve been waiting for a Human Resistance type movie since I was in the 5th fucking grade.

 
 

That depiction of the American Revolution was totally inaccurate.

None of those guys should have been wearing pants.

 
pat says:

That’s maybe the 2nd best Video about George Washington on the interwebz-

This is the first-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbRom1Rz8OA

pat says:

Ugh, format fail for the lazy people who disdain copy and paste-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbRom1Rz8OA

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Mike Pop says:

Tell me something I don’t know. ;)

Tell me something I don’t know.

Okay.

When Henrik Ibsen’s play Brand was first staged in Norway, 38 years after it was published, Egil Eide played the title role.

 
Mike Pop says:

The 6,472nd digit of pi is “3″.

Matt ACTY says:

Psh, everyone knows that. Tell me the last digit of Pi and I’ll be impressed.

ClayBuchholzLovesLaptops says:
 
 
 

Actually, here’s something you don’t know:

The Jets are about to pull a Yankees-Andrew Brackman deal (or, if you prefer, Jon Lieber or Octavio Dotel deal) and sign Plaxico Burress, knowing full and well that he’s going to get suspended likely for all of 2009 (and possibly spend part of that in jail), but expect to reap the sizeable benefit when he comes back for 2010.

And I love it. It will be like having an extra first rounder next year. I anticipate Plax being a great teammate, too, as he’ll appreciate our gratitude for sticking by him in his moment of despair.

2009 we break in Sanchez and let him build up a rapport with Cotchery, Clowney, Smith, and Stuckey; 2010 we unleash the Plax on d-coordinators. (Probably won’t cost much, either.)

Mike Pop says:

If indeed it gets done.

 
 
 
 
 

Another rain date???? Would the make it up this week? Hopefully not id rather wait till Alex is back

 
Darth Stein says:

This post captures the beauty of ABurn for me. The bottom line is that he is just not consistently good. I may be the only Yankee fan who feels this way, but despite his admittedly great stuff AJ has only been an above average pitcher. Looking at his career this is what I take away:

- AJ will tease fans with great performances
- He will fail to consistently repeat his great performances
- In the end he will be just above average
- He will be injured for a significant part of this season
- He will not pitch 200 innings again until the final year of his contract
- Like George Costanza he always leaves you wanting more

I don’t think he is going to be anything like Pavano. I just think that in the end we are all going to be mildly disappointed. That is how AJ rolls, he doesn’t inspire hate just a mild disappointment and a sense that a chance for greatness was somehow missed.

I hope that I am wrong and he does live up to his billing in NY. Now, let the sweet chorus of dissent rain down.

UWS says:
 

Which part of the post reminded you of how A.J. isn’t a good pitcher: Was it the part about the flat-screen TV, or the part about the surround-sound speakers?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-sequitur

Darth Stein says:

to tell you the truth it was the money. Followed up by the sentence on career stats.

 
 
 
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