Leave the vuvuzela at home

by 56 Comments

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A few weeks ago, few Americans knew what a vuvuzela was. The hard plastic horn that resembles a beer funnel often makes its presence known in South African soccer games, and it took the World Cup to introduce the droning sounds to a nation not so keen on having its ears assaulted. The backlash, it seems, has already begun. During last night’s Yankees-Phillies affair, security guards in the bleachers confiscated a vuvuzela from one endearing fan, and The Post speculates that the Yankees have pretty much banned them outright as the team’s policies say that fans are not permitted to “blow horns and all other distracting noisemakers.” My ears approve.

Minor League Links: Brackman, SI Yanks, Kahnle
Yankees sign Eric Bruntlett
  • Dave

    Bring on the Thunder sticks!

  • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

    You racist bastards!!!!!!!

  • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

    … the Yankees have pretty much banned them outright as the team’s policies say that fans are not permitted to “blow horns and all other distracting noisemakers.”

    List of things thus not permitted inside Yankee Stadium:
    -vuvuzelas
    -Mike Francesa

    • http://twitter.com/marcos_aguirre Marcos

      IETC

    • Jose the Satirist

      I believe Michael Kay was escorted out of the Stadium during the 8th inning.

      • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

        WHO BUT?!?!??!?

      • Mike HC

        hahah

  • Pete

    This is terrific

  • http://mystiqueandaura.com/ JMK’s Mystique and Aura

    That “fan” should be beaten to death while his closest family and friends are forced to watch.

    I’m serious.

  • Not Tank the Frank

    Imagine if the same guy got in with a vuvuzela and then proceeded to start a wave.

    Double death-penalty.

    • Not Tank the Frank

      You can go ahead and get me for an unnecessary dash penalty.

      Ahahahahahahahahahahahashit

      • Jose the Satirist

        Sounds like you’ve been drinking more than the fan was.

  • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

    Still totally encouraged in Tampa St. Petersburg:

    Cowbells.

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

      “I.G.A.F.A.T.O.P.I.M.C.” In 2011

  • Jose the Satirist

    From the article: “I have been tossed from that place hundreds of times. Many times I even deserved it.”

    What kind of fan is this guy? Just write me a check if you wanna piss away money.

    • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder
    • http://www.teamnerdrage.com dr mrs the yankee

      It’s not easy to get kicked out of YS, either (unless in previous years you tried to get up during God Bless America I guess). You generally have to piss people off so much they get security on you at least twice, throw punches or throw something (getting caught throwing stuff will always get you kicked out).

      That means he is a very special guy.

  • nathan

    I cant stand the vuvuzelas, the noise is annoying. But, I cant agree with the sentiment to ban them at the worldcup. If the competition is about spreading the game and enjoying cultures, there is no way you can ban a tradition of that country.

    I never agree with Sepp Blatter the FIFA president, but, I agree with him, if Europe was asked to stop singing their songs would they agree? I watch the games on mute, my experience as a fan is enhanced. And i cant stay Mike Tirico, he is Costas-lite.

    • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

      A word of advice, regardless of how you feel about whether or not vuvuzelas should be banned or not:

      Don’t watch any YouTube videos about the vuvuzela. I just browsed a dozen or so, and almost all of them smack of racism. They portray the blowing of vuvuzela horns as “South African Culture” and then mock it as being beneath other societies cultures.

      I think the wave is annoying, but I’m not making grandiose statements about how America is a nation of uncultured neanderthals or that France, Italy, Scotland, etc. are more cultured than we are just because some people who go to sporting contests in this country like to do the wave. Don’t go overboard, people.

      Not YouTube’s finest moment.

      • nathan

        That portrayal is quite unfortunate.

        But, cant lie, when I saw some highlights of the confederations cup on ESPN early this year, I thought there was an audio problem or those damn Lake Erie bugs were in Africa — to the relief of Joba ofcourse

      • Cult of Basebaal

        I think the wave is annoying, but I’m not making grandiose statements about how America is a nation of uncultured neanderthals or that France, Italy, Scotland, etc. are more cultured than we are just because some people who go to sporting contests in this country like to do the wave

        Well, that’s because it’s the “Mexican” Wave!

        I learned that from watching World Cup.

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

      I don’t even notice the sound when I’m watching the matches.

      • Across the pond

        I want your ears.

      • nathan

        This is focus.

        • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

          I heard an actual song being sung today during the Mexico-France match. It was the French, but they were quickly silenced by El Tri.

  • swo

    Forget the vuvuzelas. I once watched a soccer game where the crowd chant/sung the melody to “The Entertainer”……throughout the ENTIRE GAME. They did not let up for even a few seconds. They just kept looping it. 90+ minutes of absolute agony.

    • http://youcantpredictbaseball.wordpress.com/ bexarama

      I don’t even know you and I want to give you a hug of sympathy.

  • Dan

    forgive me for being off topic, but i’ve got seats to tonights game that i can’t use….actually 4 seats, 2 in the field level (102), 2 in main level (232B)…face value is 85 and 40 respectively, but in light of Goldman Sachs hating my love for sports, if anyone makes an honest offer, i’ll gladly let them enjoy the game. First come first serve, email me at Daniel.Long.1985@gmail.com if you are interested.

    Sorry RAB, i hate to break posting rules, but there is like zero time till i can no longer forward it by email and you don’t have a game threat up yet!! wont’ be looking here, will be checking email though.

  • http://mystiqueandaura.com Steve H

    If someone had said the word “vuvuzela” to me 2 weeks ago, I certainly wouldn’t have guessed it was a noise maker.

    • Jose the Satirist

      Isn’t it Spanish for “Whale’s Vagina”?

  • swo

    Also, don’t they usually have a vuvuzela blaring in Toronto? I always just referred to it as the Horn of Gondor…

    • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

      proo-dooooooooooooooo!

      NEWS TEAM!!!!!

      proo-dooooooooooooooo!

      ASSEMBLE!!!!!!

  • Pete

    I will say, however, that the Vuvuzela are not the worst thing I’ve ever heard at a sporting event. I once saw a Britain vs. Wales rugby match in Twickenham (yeah) Stadium, which holds about 80,000 people and was pretty much full. I’d guestimate that 92.4% of the attending fans were white, and 98.7% were from the UK (and .02% were americans). At several points during the game, the entire stadium broke out into the most offensive (for both auditory and social reasons) version of “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot” I’ve ever heard.

    An american slave spiritual, sung by 80,000 white brits. #worsethanvuvuzela

  • Across the pond

    Christ I forgot how irritating these things were!

    I had to suffer through them for both the African cup of nations and the confederations cup.

    As much as I’d love them banned at the world cup, it’d be very hypocritical considering there was no calls for it during the other tournaments.

    Question for you guys, how is the world cup received over there? Especially given how bad the opening round was. It was torture for us and we love the game, I could see them first few games turning a lot of Americans off the game.

    • Jose the Satirist

      I watch a good chunk of the games. Football(soccer) is probably my second favorite sport.

    • Pete

      I’m still trying to figure out what exactly soccer is, but when I know I’ll let you know how i feel about it.

      • http://mystiqueandaura.com/ JMK’s Mystique and Aura

        It’s like hockey without ice and sticks. And generally the players are from some crappy 3rd-world nation but play professionally in Italy, England or Spain but are somehow also on the national team of Belarus, despite having never been to Belarus.

        Also, though there’s a clock, I’m not quite sure what it does. Games usually end at -5:43. They’ve broken the time/space continuum. The object of the game is to get the refs to issue cards of varying colors as a penalty for nearly sliding into someone (because the opposing player is forced to pretend to have a debilitating injury).

        The game is usually accompanied by riots. I’m sure it would fare well in Detroit, where rioting is something of a sport already.

        • ColoYank

          Succinct and accurate, thanks, JMK. That about covers it.

    • Mike HC

      I would say the best way to get America involved in the game is if they keep on winning (or tying, or whatever is needed to keep advancing) Otherwise, I doubt there will be much interest is watching other countries play each other, or the European Leagues and such.

    • http://mystiqueandaura.com/ JMK’s Mystique and Aura

      I find Americans are either completely apathetic to soccer (or football, as pretty much everyone else calls it) or are ambivalent. Every few years people hype up how the Americans will surprise the world and soccer will start to catch on here. And every time there’s a marginal impact at best.

      On the other hand, Americans are super competitive when it comes to sporting in general, even if it’s something the majority don’t follow. So they want the Americans to win quite badly but if they lose, it will be completely forgotten by the next episode of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

      • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

        So they want the Americans to win quite badly but if they lose, it will be completely forgotten by the next episode of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

        Man, there’s no way I’m going to watch a show with 20-30 women on it every week, I’ll lose track of who is who.

        /MormonismJoke’d

      • Across the pond

        I suppose the real problem is the lack of International competition in your main sports.

        Like Ireland isn’t in the World cup but practically every person with a breath is watching every game they can. We’re used to international competition in all our main sports (Football, rugby etc) so even if your own team isn’t in/doing well, we still watch.

        • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

          My Facebook status from this afternoon, “They’ll be drinking Coronas in Ireland tonight”.

          • Across the pond

            You would swear we won the game ourselves.

            You can safely say we can hold a grudge like no other! :)

            • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

              It’s a well deserved grudge. To think, Thierry Henry will now be living in the greater New York Area.

        • http://mystiqueandaura.com/ JMK’s Mystique and Aura

          Fair point, but basketball and baseball have large international followings that drive competition, though the majority are domestic players, I would surmise. American football has virtually no diversity to speak of in terms of international competition.

          Many of our sports are popular globally, but will likely never see such a large following as soccer has. Americans, I feel, take somewhat of an isolationist approach to international competition because all the sports we really care about are dominated by Americans.

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bring-Melvin-To-America/193013541601?ref=sgm Andy In Sunny Daytona

      I think it’s making steady progress over here. There was a report that said that the US has bought the second most tickets for the matches. I’m sure a lot of those are ex-pats, but it’s something.

      • Across the pond

        When I was younger, I played in a football tournament in Dallas and we, along with a lot of other European teams, were truly astonished by how good some of the youth teams were over there.

        I got the impression that football is well participated in at younger ages but just suffers from the lack of a big professional game.

        • rbizzler

          Good point on the pro league as most of the premium athletes gravitate towards sports where they can make bank as a pro. The U.S. needs to produce at least on world class soccer star before the pro league will really take off. We are a phenom obsessed culture and need a ‘LeBron’ of sorts to get people interested.

        • Church of the Perpetually Outraged

          Unfortunately there’s many reasons why soccer loses it’s popularity as players get older. First, money. Even if you play for the MLS, you are making a pittance compared to other professional sports. All the money is in Europe, and outside of Tim Howard, no one has really had a successful career over there (and b/c of that, there’s a stigma against US players, deservedly so).

          Because of the lack of money, a lot of the best athletes avoid soccer. Therefore, the competition once you get to the higher levels isn’t as good as it should be. The Dallas tournament you mentioned is the pinnacle of youth US soccer. After that there’s a significant drop off.

          Then you get into lots of petty reasons, but they start to add up. In some places (in the NE this was prevalent 10 or so years ago), soccer is considered the “gay” sport. There also used to a backlash against the sport from the more “established” ones like baseball and football. In my hometown in CT, the little league coaches told us to make a choice, baseball or soccer (even though there usually wasn’t a conflict), and most of us my age picked soccer.

          The US is continuing to get better, but we’re still a third tier team.

          • rbizzler

            Where are from in CT? The soccer/baseball choice sounds vaguely familiar, but I have no regrets with my choice.

            • Church of the Perpetually Outraged

              Newington, about 10 min south of Hartford. We’d have 10am soccer games, run across the park and get changed for a noon baseball game, which annoyed a lot of the older baseball coaches (parents whose kids were out of college but stuck around to “coach”).

  • Pete
  • ColoYank

    Y’all should be glad you didn’t have to go to the Oakland/Alameda County Coliseum Complex to watch the Yankees. I had to for the 24 years I lived in Northern California. The standards are so low there, they actually encouraged people to bring those and blow in them during the games. I think they knew there wouldn’t be any ambient noise, otherwise, except from the Yankee fans in attandance, who were usually the majority.

    Don’t even get me started on the inane phenomenon of Crazy George. Baseball games do not need a flippin’ cheerleader! It did hurt me the other day, while I was watching a home game on TV, and the Jumbotron, or whatever it’s called, was exhorting everyone to “Get Loud.” That’s one thing, but then the noise level actually went up. I muted and shed a quiet tear.

    • rbizzler

      I am not doubting you, but in my 6+ years of going to games at the Coliseum, I never remember seeing one of those joints.

      I did however see a Bleacher Creature (he had one of those custom Yankee jerseys with ‘section ___’ on the back) at Camden Yards with a vuvuzela. He was promptly ejected when he started funneling beer out of it. Good times.

  • bonestock94

    Coming soon to a Ray’s game near you.