Apr
29

Game 25: Fatten Up

By
The team may stink, but those are some rad uniforms. (Getty)

The team may stink, but those are some rad uniforms. (Getty)

Winning four of four against the Blue Jays over the weekend was the start of what could be an outstanding homestand. The Astros bring the second worst record (7-18) and first worst run differential (-50) in baseball into this three-game midweek series, so the Yankees have a chance to really fatten up their win total as the calendar gets ready to flip over to January. No big league team is a pushover and it’s unrealistic to expect a sweep in any series, but taking two of three against Houston feels like an absolute bare minimum to me. Here’s the lineup that will face right-hander Lucas Harrell…

  1. CF Brett Gardner
  2. 2B Robinson Cano
  3. LF Vernon Wells
  4. DH Travis Hafner
  5. RF Brennan Boesch
  6. 3B Jayson Nix
  7. 1B Lyle Overbay
  8. SS Eduardo Nunez
  9. C Austin Romine

And on the mound is the former Astro, Andy Pettitte.

It’s been raining on and off all day in New York and there are expected to be some light showers tonight, but it’s not supposed to be anything heavy enough to delay or postpone the game. It will just be one of those ugly, misty games. Tonight’s game is scheduled to start a little after 7pm ET and can be seen on YES. Enjoy.

Kevin Youkilis Update: Youkilis (back) had an MRI today as scheduled, but the results are not back yet. He isn’t too concerned, but obviously something is wrong. He wouldn’t have missed seven of the last eight games otherwise.

Categories : Game Threads
  • The Real Greg

    Here it is.

    And I agree. 2 our of 3 is the bare minimum

  • Winter

    InB4 Havok’s “FOR PRUSSIA”

    • Havok9120

      Verdammt.

    • vicki

      i think the lesson here is that it has to be havok’s invocation.

      • Havok9120

        Further testing is required, but that does seem to be the early indication, yes.

  • Eddard

    Andy should be able to saw through this lineup with ease. Put a couple runs on the board and it’s over. If Brandon Laird is your #3 hitter you’re one of the worst AL teams in the history baseball.

  • WhittakerWalt

    “January?”

    • jjyank

      The Blue Jays take offense.

    • Get Phelps Up

      Not a fan of Christmas baseball?

  • Cervelli is the Man

    I bet Andy is missing Cervelli right now.

  • The Real Greg

    So you let the worst team in the AL jump ahead of you. FAILURE

    • Get Phelps Up

      The Red Sox were down 1-0 yesterday.

      • The Real Greg

        Well failure to them too.

        • Get Phelps Up

          You’d be one hell of a school teacher.

          • Havok9120

            “None of that namby-pamby encouragement for me. Failure to all of you!”

    • Robinson Tilapia

      Go for a drive.

    • Havok9120

      Please, PLEASE tell me you’re joking. Because otherwise, several people called this.

  • Winter

    So… now what?

  • Robinson Tilapia

    SEASON OVER. OMGZ. TEH TEH TEH.

  • Rolling Doughnut

    Just got here. What’s wrong w/Andy?

    • Cervelli is the Man

      No Cervelli

    • Winter

      Nothing, really. Ground ball single, dinky single, solid single.

      • Anderson Silva

        that and the fact that he’s missing his spots by a mile

    • Anderson Silva

      crapping the bed against a shitty opponent.

  • Anderson Silva

    Really Andy? Really?

  • Robinson Tilapia

    PRUSSIA. PRUSSIA. PRUSSIA.

  • teddy

    all because giradri a shift on laird. should been an easy 123 inning

  • nslaem

    Anyone notice the totally empty sections behind the Astro dugout.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      7:20 in NYC. Relax.

    • Cervelli is the Man

      I am noticing a totally empty stadium Sad compared to Yankee stadium when I was younger. Even the pre-Jeter lousy teams had better crowds.

  • Eddard

    Just throw a strike to Corporation, Andy. He’s not going to hurt you. THROW STRIKES!

  • Wheels

    Lets get out of this inning, jeez.

  • Eddard

    Get Nuno warming. Andy looks awful.

  • Get Phelps Up

    Let’s trade Andy to the Marlins.

  • Havok9120

    So this is what happens when I show up ten minutes late and don’t rally the troops in the name of Prussia. :(

  • The Real Greg

    You knew it was too good to be true,

    • Havok9120

      ……….

      Greg, for real, go have a drink, maybe take a nap, something. There is no reason to believe 3 runs is some insurmountable goal against the worse team in the AL.

      • The Real Greg

        But you can’t give up 3 runs to the worst team in the AL. This team scored 10 runs in 4 games at Fenway.

        • Get Phelps Up

          Release Andy immediately.

        • Havok9120

          Yes, yes you can. You know why? BECAUSE IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.

          All. The. Time. They average 4 runs per game.

          All the time.

  • Winter

    D:

  • Cervelli is the Man

    And on top of it I have Andy on my fantasy team. ugh

  • SeventhAce

    WTfark?

  • Robinson Tilapia

    This just in: A bunch of Yankee fans are overreacting.

    • The Real Greg

      I’m not overreacting to the possibility of losing. I’m reacting to the loss of a chance to really dominate a team in a game.

      • Get Phelps Up

        You realize that a 4-3 win counts exactly the same as an 11-3 win, right?

        • The Real Greg

          Not in the anxiety department

          • Get Phelps Up

            Then do something else.

          • jjyank

            Be quiet. The Yankees have overcome leads just as big against better teams. Just chill and watch for once.

            • The Real Greg

              That’s not the issue. Can they be the team that builds a lead for once? That’s the issue.

              • jjyank

                No, that is the issue. Relax dude.

          • DC

            FALLACY

      • Robinson Tilapia

        Who gives a shit?

      • Rolling Doughnut

        It’s baseball ff’s sake. If ya can’t stand da heat…

  • The Real Greg

    You would think that one of these games the Yankees will dominate from start to finish. My goodness.

    • Winter

      Nah, that’s tomorrow when Humber is pitching. Last start he gave up 7 ER in 4.2 innings. That was an improvement on the start before when he gave up 8 ER in 0.1 innings.

      • Winter

        Damn. Forgot to close my italics.

        • SeventhAce

          I can’t tell what you’re emphasizing!!!!

    • Robinson Tilapia

      Do you like to be dominated, Greg? Please. Tell us.

      • The Real Greg

        No I just want a game when the Yankees dominate so that we can all relax.

        • Robinson Tilapia

          Greg, am I going to have to invite Svetlana, my dominatrix friend from Brighton Beach, into the game thread?

          • SeventhAce

            Is she hot?

            /mandatory

            • Robinson Tilapia

              She’s eight foot one, but yeah, she’s hot.

  • jjyank

    Jeez. Alright. Settle down, Andy, and let’s score some runs.

  • Leg-End

    I wouldn’t bet against Andy shutting them down for the next six, he was just missing his spots that inning.

  • jtb

    Absolutely inexcusable to let the worst team in the league score 3 runs on you in the first inning in your own home park. Horrible pitching, all those hits the pitches were UP in the zone. Atrocious pitching and decisions…

    • Winter

      Andy wasn’t his sharpest in the first inning today. It happens.

      There, I just excused it.

  • Havok9120

    My favorite ironic quote comes to mind here:

    “Let all brave Prussians follow me!”

    TO VICTORY!

    • Robinson Tilapia

      *raises Prussian goblet of mead and blood*

      • Havok9120

        *decapitated by a cannonball*

  • Wheels

    He couldn’t have stretched that into a double.

    • Havok9120

      As soon as Kay said that I giggled. This is Robbie we’re talking about. That would’ve been close for Gardner, let alone Cano.

  • Svetlana

    Greg, come seet on my reeed vehlvet couch.

    • The Real Greg

      Okay that made me laugh. Way to go.

      • Svetlana

        Do yoo vant me to pool out dee feather, Greg?

        • Thorny

          Who wants a mustache ride?

  • Eddard

    People do realize that even the worst team in the league wins 60 games, right? They do occasionally win. I think it’s just because the Sox swept them that people are reacting this way. We just swept the Jays you know.

    • jjyank

      I rarely say this, but…thank you, Eddard. It’s baseball. Shit is going to happen. Even shitty teams score runs. But it’s also the second inning, and the Yankees have been the “come back kids” lately, so let’s just chill out and see what happens.

      • The Real Greg

        I’m not complaining because they’re going to lose, which is still undecided.

        I’m complaining because you have Andy Pettitte on the mound, you have the worst team in baseball coming into your park, so this clearly looks like a time to flex you muscles and kick the crap out of a team.

        But no, in the first inning, you spot them 3 runs…

        • jjyank

          They didn’t spot them shit, Greg, just stop. Even a HOF caliber pitcher is going to give up 3 runs ever 9 IP. Shit happens. Andy had a bad inning, or maybe the Astros had a good inning. That shit just happens. Accept it.

    • heismanziel

      While this may be true, let’s not act like the astros are a legit MLB team. They are a glorified minor league team. We will win this game.

    • Rolling Doughnut

      What? Logic on this thread? wow.

      • Havok9120

        From Eddard, no less.

  • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

    I’m just saying, Robbie had absolutely zero chance for a double. He wouldn’t even have been thrown out sliding into second, it would have been a rundown.

  • wow

    well, this is great.

  • Alkaline

    Just put on the game. What the heck happened? Reverse jinx?

    BTW, beautiful turn thereby the middle infield. Very smooth.

  • Eddard

    Nuney and Cano are a pretty good 1-2 punch. They’ve got their timing down like clockwork.

    • Winter

      Yeah, just like Cedeno and Altuve.

  • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

    So we’re down 3 against the Astros.. why hasn’t the internet exploded yet??

    • Robinson Tilapia

      Because we’re in awe of your awesome screen name.

      • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

        Haha, thanks, I had the epiphany this morning listening to Q1043.

    • Havok9120

      Scroll up some.

      • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

        Oh no. I thought it’d be x10000 worse. That there is nothing.

        • Havok9120

          I got DECAPITATED by a CANNONBALL.

          Heartless bastard.

          • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

            Haha. Must have missed that. WE FIGHT FOR KING HAVOK.

            • jjyank

              Now this is just gonna go to his head.

            • Havok9120

              Vorwärts!

          • Alkaline

            Sacrifices must be made.

            • Havok9120

              ietc

  • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

    The announcers are making way too small of a deal out of an awesome play. This is not their sharpest night.

  • jjyank

    That was a pretty DP turn by Cano there.

  • Alkaline

    Also, any specific reason for the Prussia meme? Is it a play on for mother Russia that a missed?

    • Winter

      Look up Prussia’s military history.

    • jjyank

      Havok is going to be very disappointed in you.

    • Havok9120

      They’re a bunch of badasses who were pretty much declared hopeless underdogs just before systematically kicking the crap out of their rivals.

      And I really like shouting the name.

    • Havok9120

      And they did this about a dozen times over the course of about three centuries or so.

      • Alkaline

        Ah, it rings a bell. Some areas of my history degree are lacking. Courses at my college were limiting at times.

        • Havok9120

          I’m the only person in the entire department focusing on Central Europe in the Early Modern through late Victorian periods. I am also one of mayyyybe half a dozen focused on military/political history rather than social/cultural.

          So you’ve nothing to be ashamed of. :P

          • Alkaline

            Heh. That’s pretty interesting, though. I wish my school offered more classes on that time period. I had some on England/Britain, but that was it. Also, a great Nazi Germany class. Other than that, most of my classes dealt with social/cultural issues. I wish there were more military/political history, but they just weren’t offered. Results of a smaller college, I guess.

            How much longer do you have?

            • Havok9120

              I’ve got one more year of undergrad and I’m in early acceptance for my quickie graduate program. I’ll be able to get my Master’s in about a year en route to my PhD.

              And it’s really not just limited to small schools. American history departments are focusing pretty hardcore on social/cultural. They’re also moving away from ancient history and classics. There’s only a handful of schools left here with well known MilHist or Ancient History departments.

  • Get Phelps Up

    If the Yankees win this game it won’t count because they wouldn’t have done it Greg’s way.

  • Svetlana

    Greg….

    • The Real Greg

      It was funny the first time. Now not so much.

      • Havok9120

        Killjoy.

  • heismanziel

    I really hate these blackout restrictions. I can’t watch the game on YES, and to make things worse, the astros game is not on fox sports southwest. So.. I have to find a third party site to watch this game.

  • Anderson Silva

    2 innings, 2 DPs. Great start.

  • heismanziel

    damnit…

  • wow

    making this guy look like an ace right now.

    • The Real Greg

      Well he actually is the Astros best starter.

  • Winter

    Footrace between Pronk and Nunez/Gardner 3-legged. Who wins?

    • SeventhAce

      Gardner, while dragging Nunez like a rag doll.

      • MannyGeee

        Depends on if Nunez needs to keep his helmet on or not…

  • Wheels

    Ho hum.

  • Kramerica Industries

    Houston is 4-2 against Seattle. That’s the team they give trouble to in the West.

    • Havok9120

      They’re trying to build up hope. Don’t ruin it so soon.

  • heismanziel

    The A’s are hosting the Angels tonight, and they are having Josh Hamilton appreciation night. Fans will be wearing ” He dropped it” T shirts, and will give Hamilton a standing ovation when he comes to the plate. Classic.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      Wow. Funny, but…they’re dicks.

  • Kramerica Industries

    That stupid fucker still kills this team. Unreal.

  • wow

    the Astros just making it look easy.

    • MannyGeee

      Best troll of the season so far… Awesome

  • nycsportzfan

    Are we up 3-0, or are they? Just wanted to make sure there wasen’t a error on the score keeper, or something..lol j/k.. Lets go boys, time to bash these fools!

  • Alkaline

    We’re just biding our time for a dramatic comeback, right?

    • The Real Greg

      Hopefully. Otherwise, David Phelps better pitch well on Wednesday.

  • Svetlana

    Greg, come seet on this thumbtack while I smack yoo.

  • The Real Greg

    That’s clearly ball 4 Lyle

    • Wheels

      Yeah, but at least his cold sore is healing.

  • nycsportzfan

    Harrell mowing us down…

  • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

    This is pretty pathetic.

  • nycsportzfan

    Is Nunez ever gonna get a hit? Go figure, people say his defense sucks and hes a decent bat, and yet, he hasen’t hit a lick and his defense has been solid…

    • The Real Greg

      That thought has been stirring in my mind.

      • Svetlana

        Zen I am not working hard enough.

        • The Real Greg

          Just not my type, sweetheart.

          /Bogart’d

          • jjyank

            What in the hell is your type?

            • The Real Greg

              Intelligent, dark hair, not a runway model figure or hourglass but somewhere in between.

              • jjyank

                And how do you know that Svetlana ins’t exactly that?

                • Havok9120

                  Well, she’s 8’1″ for one thing.

                  • jjyank

                    Greg never mentioned a height restriction.

                    • The Real Greg

                      Reasonable height.

                  • The Real Greg

                    That too.

                    • vicki

                      you don’t pay a pro domme to be your girlfriend, greg.

                • The Real Greg

                  Because she’s on this forum so it clearly takes her out of one of those requirements.

                  Don’t get angry ’cause I just insulted myself.

          • Svetlana

            Quit bullsheeting and bend back over.

  • Kramerica Industries

    Wild guess:

    1915-1917 Philadelphia A’s. Those were horrifically bad teams.

    • The Real Greg

      Thought it was the 62-63 Mets but I’ve backed down from that.

    • Kramerica Industries

      Damn. 1917 A’s only lost 98 games.

      So close. 1915 lost 109 and 1916 lost 117. I wasn’t too far off the mark.

  • The Real Greg

    Andy leaving everything up.

    • Svetlana

      …..

  • Anderson Silva

    where’s the offense?

  • Troll

    As always, Mike Axisa has to jinx the team. When are you going to learn, dear Michael of Blue Avenue on the River, that whenever you all but guarantee a win, a sweep, or even tempt the baseball gods with a “trap”, the Yankees not only play down to their opponent, they play beneath them. Mikey, baby, I hereby excommunicate you from the internet.

    • The Real Greg

      Cue Akbar

      • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

        You read my mind.

      • Svetlana

        Ever heard of queening, Greg? Cue this.

  • Troll

    Robbie Grossman . . . Now there’s a Jew name if I’ve ever heard one in baseball . . .

  • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

    All right. So this is bad.

  • Kramerica Industries

    Absolutely ridiculous.

  • Eddard

    Andy might as well set that one up on a tee. Even these guys can hit that.

  • The Real Greg

    So the Astros score 10 runs in 4 games in Fenway and they score 5 in 4 innings in Yankee Stadium. Go figure.

  • Karl Krawfid

    Can’t blame Romine when Andy is missing up with everything.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      I’d wager to say you blame Romine for none of this.

  • Wheels

    Yo yo yo yo yo

  • Anderson Silva

    simply doesn’t have it tonight. Please get him out ASAP.

  • Troll

    This game is ovahhhhh, ladies and gentleturds. Blame it on Axisa.

  • Rolling Doughnut

    Joe postgame: Hey they’re a Major League basebaaal team we just didn’t get it done toooday.

  • wow

    welp, this sucks. I’m done.

  • MannyGeee

    I started at the beginning of the comments section after getting in late from coaching, and I think I made a terrible mistake…. Eddard wants to replace Pettitte with Vidal fucking Nuno, the Real Greg is blowing his gasket over not winning 11-3 already and then Eddard was the voice of reason.

    Wow. Just wow…

  • Karl Krawfid

    I just knew that was going into the crowd.

  • Kramerica Industries

    Nunez did everything he could to make it 6-0.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      That’s my Nunie. Maybe he’ll hit .400 now.

  • King George

    Mike is learning a hard sports journalism lesson…don’t predict a series over before it’s started.

    • http://www.riveraveblues.com Mike Axisa

      Where did I predict the series?

      • The Real Greg

        Well you said 2 out of 3 is a bare minimum. so that’s as close as you can get.

        • http://www.riveraveblues.com Mike Axisa

          No.

          • King George

            No big league team is a pushover and it’s unrealistic to expect a sweep in any series, but taking two of three against Houston feels like an absolute bare minimum to me.

            I’m just giving you a hard time, Mike. But that sure is skating with a technicality.

      • Troll

        It’s all your fault, Michael. All of it. Look at what you’ve done, man. The horror . . . THE HORROR!

        • Troll

          In all seriousness, though, I do blame you. Watch, Astros will sweep the Yankees. Book it. Didn’t that happen with the Nationals several years back?

          • The Real Greg

            They lost 2 of 3 to the Nats the year in 2009.

            • Troll

              Yeah, that’s the vibe I’m getting here. They’ll be lucky to squeeze out a win.

  • Dalek Jeter

    We all know the right moves here.
    1. Trade Andy. He’s clearly over the hill. Work a 7 way trade and get Stanton back for him.

    2. Fire Girardi. He clearly can’t get his team up to beat the worst team in the league. Hire this Joe Torre guy. I hear he’s good.

    3. Fire Cashman…just because alll of the reasons.

    4. Sell the team.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      Paid attendance tomorrow: Three.

  • The Real Greg

    Wow I was right.

    • Svetlana

      You like?

    • MannyGeee

      I am afraid to find out what you’re right about. Did you profitsize it, dalelama style? I have to know!

      • The Real Greg

        I got the trivia question right with my first guess, but I was hedging on it a bit.

  • Havok9120

    Good call on the trivia question Greg.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      Pfffffft, no way. He backed down. That doesn’t count.

    • The Real Greg

      I reneged it a bit because I thought the Mets had to have improved a bit from their 1st year to their second

  • Troll

    Have the Yankees had a monster inning yet this year? 6+ runs and a whole turn through the lineup?

    • vicki

      what’d you do with all your extra time the last four days?

      • Troll

        I’ll pretend I know what you’re talking about and tell you that I had a barnyard orgy with a five hundred pound woman named “Moose”, a gaggle of geese, two blind billy goats, and a transexual cow. What’d you do?

    • BigBlueAL

      They have only scored 6+ runs in a game 5 times this season. Good luck scoring that many in an inning.

  • Rolling Doughnut

    Missed the bag

  • Winter

    Gameday: On-field Delay.

    What happened?

    • Get Phelps Up

      The Astros were arguing the call at 1b.

      • Winter

        Was it the right call? Not that it matters anymore.

        • Wheels

          No, it looked like Gardner missed the bag.

        • Get Phelps Up

          It looked like it was.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      Gameday is off. No delay.

  • jtb

    I wonder if we are still “overreacting”?

    • MannyGeee

      Yes. Unless there is an impending cancellation of the rest of the season and its a winner take all situation tonight, then 1000 times yes.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      Halfway through one game? What do you think?

      No one’s gotten hurt. That’s literally all I care about. They could swept here and it’s still the beginning of May. Did you just start watching baseball yesterday?

      • The Real Greg

        No if they get swept, they deserve that reaction.

        • Robinson Tilapia

          Deserve what reaction? Some twit troll’s overreaction?

          They’d still be 3 games over .500 if they were swept. They were how many games under .500 in mid-May in 2009, and being swept by shitty teams? Please.

          • The Real Greg

            Difference is that the Yankees don’t have a full interleague period to really rack up some wins. The interleague series are all spread out.

            • Robinson Tilapia

              That makes no fucking sense whatsoever.

              You win the games in front of you. Doesn’t matter what league it’s against.

              • The Real Greg

                But in their recent history, they really got going in that interleague period. That is now not there.

                • Robinson Tilapia

                  So win the rest of the games. Lord knows you play more of them against your own league.

          • jtb

            The overreaction is what every news media outlet does every single day for 80 years over what they call “news”. There isn’t anything “new” about it. Overreaction is what ALL liberals and evolutionist do over FACTS, they get in an emotional panic..

    • Dalek Jeter

      To a single loss? In Andy’s first bad game of the season? throwing to a catcher who has never caught him? Absolutely.

  • nsalem

    Harrell is pitching like a caucasian fucking Wang.

    • Troll

      My personal favorite. Mmm, nom nom nom.

  • Robinson Tilapia

    Amaro Montenegro. Rocks.

  • Kramerica Industries

    Andy anything but Dandy tonight.

  • nsalem

    Maybe Andy was tipping his ptches

    /november3 2001september5 2003

  • The Real Greg

    What makes it look bad is that Boston completely dismantled the Astros at Fenway. And now they come here and they act like they own the place.

    Make that 6 runs in 4.1 innings

    • The Real Greg

      Make that 8. Two more and they match their Fenway total. In one game.

      • Troll

        I hear you. I’m the only, but I hear you. Boston looks damn good by comparison, which is scary considering they were supposed to suck something awful this season.

        • The Real Greg

          I know. And I promised to calm down with the Boston stuff but I mean, they’re 18-7 and people had them in last place.

          • Robinson Tilapia

            Can the stat team tell us what percentage of 162 25 is?

          • Dalek Jeter

            And those same people had the Yankees winning like 83 games. Newsflash: Pundits (whether it be baseball, politics, whatever) are wrong as often as their right.

          • Troll

            I think you have every right to worry. The way they’re winning seems sustainable. They’re getting contributions from almost everybody. Even Ellsbury looks good again. Ortiz found the Fountain of Youth and Pedroia just continues to get on base. If Lackey can somehow fall in line, then their pitching all of sudden looks great. Their bullpen has the pieces for dominance, in my opinion. Don’t even get me started on Nava, Napoli, and any other over-achieving son of a bitch over there. Can I include Carp? Ciriaco too, just because I inexplicably hate him. Seems to me like they’re simply clicking and it might actually last. But, with respect to the Yankees, it’ll be a welcome return for Teixera and Granderson, who I’m typically not a fan of because of their overall underperformance. Oh, and, yeah, the strikeouts, pop-ups, and GIDPs. I think the key player for New York, actually, is ARod. Jeter’s Jeter and I’m sure he’ll be doing his thing in no time.

      • Dalek Jeter

        Jesus Greg. It’s one game. Out of 162. Did you watch the games this weekend where we beat the Blue Jays? Or do you just tune into losses to lament how much worse the Yankees make your day?

      • Erica

        Oh go away already.

  • flamingo

    …What is going on.

    • nsalem

      Our pitching sucks tonight and theirs is very good. So were probably going to lose this game. That’s what’s happening. It’s no big deal. Sort of funny.

  • Robinson Tilapia

    Svetlana’s been replaced by the homely Bud Light girls. Nothing but George Jones on the jukebox tonight.

  • Mick taylor

    Petite would not bewitching this badifcervelli were catching .this Adam Warren sucks .

  • Kramerica Industries

    Comical.

  • Erica

    My excitement for this game got me through work todaaaaaaay. Wah.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      You can still be excited, Erica. It’s ok.

      • Erica

        My excitement was Pettitte-based. Le sigh. Silly ‘Stros! You can’t shut this party down!!!

        • Robinson Tilapia

          No you can’t. Pour yourself a drink. Like I said, I’m having myself a nice Amaro Montenegro on the rocks. Fine, smooth Italian liquor. Nothing better.

          Greg was dominated by an 8’1″ Russian at the start of the thread. And he liked it.

          • The Real Greg

            For like a minute.

            • Robinson Tilapia

              Bullfuckingshit. She’s probably smacking you in your little baby balls right now.

          • Erica

            I left my vino at my boyfriend’s place…wompppp. Your drink sounds delicious.

            I saw that. Maybe we need Svet on the mound now lulz.

            • The Real Greg

              That’s a good idea.

              • Robinson Tilapia

                With that wingspan, she’d make Randy Johnson look like that midget on the Royals.

  • Troll

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Where’s the optimism now? 6 innings to score 8 runs . . . I’mma gonna go wit’ NO.

    • Troll

      Make that 5 innings. I was feeling generous!

  • Mickey Scheister

    Nuno, Nuno, Nuno, Nuno, Nuno!!!

    Get this scurvy fuck outta there!

  • The Real Greg

    The only thing I can take from this game is if they bring Nuno

  • Wheels

    Make it stop.

  • Erica

    I mean, whatever. ONE GAME! It’s just one game. And also it’s Monday and gloomy and everyone is a little off-kilter today. So this game kind of fits today’s theme.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      They could win 20-0 and it’s still a new game tomorrow.

      Go ahead, Greg. Say it.

      • Erica

        It’s the end of the farkin’ world for Greg!!!!

      • nsalem

        I would imagine that it is easier to explain that to a 2 year old.

        • Robinson Tilapia

          No matter what the score is, my boy would just look at the screen, go “YANKEES! BOOM!”, and just walk away.

          We should all be more like him.

        • Erica

          I will go explain this to a baby elephant and he will just *get* it.

      • The Real Greg

        No because you said “could”. So no fallacy.

        Svetlana will now come up with a phallic joke right now

        • Robinson Tilapia

          This is why Svetlana left. Your piss poor job of trying to dominate. Is that all the fight you’ve got?

          COME AT SVETLANA, BRO!

  • JRod

    Wonder how many innings they’re going to make Warren eat tonight.

  • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

    Still thought we were in this down 6 runs. I’d be content with avoiding a shutout right about now. Eesh.

  • http://www.penuel-law.com/ Cuso

    This was bound to happen. They get swept 4 games at Fenway, then they get 4 in Detroit after this.

    The Astros are a MLB team like it or not. They’re not going to roll over because all the Yankee doubters want to change the narrative and say that these games should be a given.

    I’m not surprised one bit by the score. Not one bit.

    Go get em tomorrow Hirok.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      They’re all MLB teams. This is what some people don’t get.

      If your pitching is off one night, you’re going to get hit. That could be a poor MLB team. It could be a AAA team. It could be a AA team. If your pitching is off, professional hitters are going to take advantage of it.

      That’s why they’re where they are and we’re where we are.

      • Rolling Doughnut

        Well said.

      • Erica

        Yessir! You have all of Teh_Logic.

        • Robinson Tilapia

          TEH LOGIC! TEH TEH TEH LOGIC!

    • Matt

      Really? You’re not surprised by them getting blown out at home by a team that might threaten the single season loss record with Andy Pettitte on the mound?

      Stop trying to rationalize what happened simply because it happened. This was a pathetic performance. One of the worst single games that the Yankees as a franchise have played in the last 5 years. And given the opponent, it may very well be the worst.

      Nowhere am I saying that one game all of a sudden means that the season is over. I’m sure 10 people will jump into this thread and try to argue that like the crazies they are. But to deny that this was not only a terrible game, but completely unexpected is just asinine.

      • Troll

        Agreed. A loss is acceptable, but to be dominated . . . Nobody expected that. There’s no rhyme or reason. The Yankees just got their ass handed to them. (And yes, the game is already over)

      • Evan3457

        Every time the Yankees lose a game like this to a team like this, I think about this game which I personally attended, a long, long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away…):

        http://www.baseball-reference......9100.shtml

        Oh, and the Yanks won it all that year…

        • Erica

          Oooooof!!! Great year though :)

    • Tom

      You are not surprised the Yankees are down 9-0 with Andy making the start?

      It’s one thing to say you are not surprised by the Yankees getting beat by Houston, but this score is not surprising? At all?

      • Robinson Tilapia

        It’s surprising. I just don’t think it means anything in the grand scheme of things. They could win 20-0, 30-0. Tomorrow’s still another game.

        You’re going to have stretches in which you look like the ’98 Yankees and some in which you look like the 1899 Cleveland Spiders sometimes.

        • Tom

          So you agree with me?

          • Robinson Tilapia

            That’s it’s surprising? Of course.

            • Tom

              And yet you didn’t call BS on it when you replied to Cuso.

              • Robinson Tilapia

                Who gives a shit?

                • Tom

                  Apparently you. You police the boards – but apparently only call out the dumb negative comments.

                  • Robinson Tilapia

                    Do you feel slighted? Sad? As if people are playing favorites, and you’re just not one of them? Does this happen to you outside of internet comment sections as well?

                    • Tom

                      No you are a regular – so your opinion counts more (at least inside your own head).

                    • Robinson Tilapia

                      You are an incredibly sad boy.

    • The Real Greg

      I didn’t expect a sweep. I though the Yanks would take the first two and then Phelps would lose.

      This loss makes it tougher because Phelps needs to pitch well.

  • Dalek Jeter

    Meanwhile, I found a website that you basically play 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon with. I can’t get passed like 3 degrees of separation. Somebody help me out.

    • Erica

      Link.

      • Dalek Jeter
        • Dalek Jeter

          Say goodbye to the rest of your evening.

          • Winter

            I hate you. Also haven’t been able to get better than 3.

            • Erica

              I got 2! Julia Roberts.

              • Erica

                Sorry, 1.

            • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

              Really? Like everybody I got has been two. Derek Jeter is a two. Stan Lee is a two. Swishy is a three.

          • The Real Greg

            Have you tried the actors who played the Doctor?

            Troughton: 3
            Tom Baker: 2
            Hartnell: 2
            Pertwee: 2
            Davison: 2
            Colin Baker: 3
            McCoy: 2
            McGann: 2
            Smith: 2
            Tennant: 2
            Eccleston: 2

            • Winter

              Sorry, by “better” I meant farther.

              • Winter

                Wrong reply, sorry.

            • Dalek Jeter

              Yeah, I was happy Colin Baker got me 3…but I want 4 god damnit.

              • The Real Greg

                A lot of the British actors I type in are related through the animated movie Balto

              • The Thumb

                I got a 4!!!

                Roberto Benigni

              • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

                Nick Swisher is a three.

  • jtb

    9-0 vs the worst team in the league. You are a moron Girardi, this is one of the reasons i simply can’t stand you. Adam Warren another “great” farmhand…so typical.

    • Erica

      Is this guy worth replying to? Because… LOL.

      • Robinson Tilapia

        No, he’s not, and he’s not even very good at what he does.

        There were once great trolls here. Trolls of valor. Trolls that stuck their neck out for everything that was good and troll-y. This guy ain’t it.

        • Erica

          He is nothing but a Treasure Troll! Actually, he doesn’t even have a gem in his belly button.

          • Robinson Tilapia

            Nah. That’s just green lint.

            • Erica

              Shiny lint. Ewwwwww.

        • TomH

          I laughed and laughed.

      • Troll

        You technically just replied to him. So . . . LOL?

        • Erica

          LOL!

  • Get Phelps Up

    So…does Stewie take the mound today?

  • Rolling Doughnut

    Shit happens. Texas is 16-9 and the Stros beat them 8-2 in their opener.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      Contrary to popular belief, they do occasionally win games.

  • Bill

    This season would really be quite enjoyable for fans if only the Jeet man was here…

    I’m a bigger fan of Nunez than most and he is def gonna get hot someday soon… but damn have we been spoiled all these years, this point CANNOT be emphasized enough

    Get well soon Derek

  • fabricio

    its alright guys hopefully we can avoid getting shut out and we’ll come back tomorrow and bust some ass

    • Robinson Tilapia

      We can still try to win this one too, but yup. They actually only still count as one game in the standings.

  • Winter

    For anyone playing Dalek Jeter’s Kevin Bacon game who wants a real challenge, the average Harvey Keitel number is lower than the average Kevin Bacon number. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

  • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

    All right, I gotta admit it: This sucked ass.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      My mistake. It STILL sucks ass. It’s not over.

  • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

    Get your rally caps on.

  • Rolling Doughnut

    Fuck you Robbie.

  • Erica

    Shutout bid PWNED.

  • Dalek Jeter

    Here comes the comeback for the ages.

    Calling it right now: The Yankees will bring the tying run to the plate in this game.

    • Winter

      Meh, nothing against the Astros can beat last year’s Fenway comeback.

      • Dalek Jeter

        That game was awesome. I’m still upset they cut away on MLB Gameday for Fister’s no-hitter(perfecto?)

        • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

          Humber’s. Who we will be teeing off of tomorrow.

        • Erica

          I remember scarfing down Wawa sandwiches with my bf in his car in the parking lot of Wawa when that comeback happened, with John Sterling hollering through the speakers of his Jetta. AHHHHH MEMORIES.

        • WhittakerWalt

          It was Humber’s (fake) perfecto.

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      I admire the optimism, and normally I sign up for that…but not this time, I gotta admit. It ain’t happening, I think.

      But man, it would be AWESOME.

      • Robinson Tilapia

        C’mon. What’s the worst that could happen? Being wrong?

        • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

          But…I hate being wrong!

          http://xkcd.com/386/

          • Dalek Jeter

            One of my favorite webcomics ever.

            • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

              I only read this and “Looking For Group”. I’ve tried other webcomics and can’t stand them.

    • Robinson Tilapia

      I’ll co-sign.

    • Rolling Doughnut

      I remember once the Yanks came back against the Angels down by 8 runs in the ninth. They tied it up then lost in extras.

      • jdp

        Against Frank Tanana?

        • Rolling Doughnut

          I don’t remember who against I was 6 but I remember my Dad almost blew a gasket.

  • Winter

    Nuno… So many RAB commenters are climaxing right now.

    • Mickey Scheister

      I came. I saw. I came again.

    • Ricky Balboa

      Was it good for you too?

  • forensic

    Well, this sure is the most pitiful score of the season (hopefully).

    I don’t know if it’s more embarrassing that Pettitte apparently got smacked all over the park by a below average offense (is he still on their payroll or what?) or that the offense has one whole run against maybe the worst pitching staff in baseball…

    • Robinson Tilapia

      That’d be one hell of an Embedded Astro, as well as a pretty dumb one if this was the moment he was waiting for.

    • Tom

      It’s the pitching.

      Outside of the 25 run outburst in 2 games against CLE, this offense is averaging less than 4 runs a game (and that includes 7 games against the 2nd worst pitching in the AL, the Jays).

      The offense has been very timely, but it is still a whole lot of smoke and mirrors. Especially with Youkilis out, this lineup is paper thin – Boesch and nIx in the 5 and 6 spots in the lineup is not a good thing (unfortunately a necessary thing with all the injuries, but still not a good thing)

  • fabricio

    this is so wrong but corporan running like that had me dying of laughter

    • DLSIII

      Corcoran running like that made me think of CMW running like that…. He was so good for us till then.

  • Cool Lester Smooth

    Damn, Nuno is just pumping that cheddar.

    You can tell that they were just overwhelmed by his 80 mph heater.

    • Mickey Scheister

      Deception, changing speeds, control, works fast to along with his 90 flaming fastball.

      • Cool Lester Smooth

        He got it up to 90? I dropped in halfway through and only saw low 80s.

  • JonS

    Holy shit!! I just got off a plane and saw the score. What happened? Just one of them days I hope.

    • Erica

      Lettuce’s first day catching Andy. Andy wasn’t exactly sharp and we were somehow overpowered by the Astros pitcher. Oh wellllll!

  • Erica

    Ohhhhhh not a good day for our pal Lettuce.

  • Mickey Scheister

    Please hit an Astro, first Haf now Lettuce. C’mon man!

    • Robinson Tilapia

      *plunks Cesar Cedeno*

  • JLC 776

    Alright, time to score some sympathy runs…

  • JLC 776

    Or not.

  • Cool Lester Smooth

    Oh, shit!

    88 mph!

    • Cool Lester Smooth

      89!

      • Mickey Scheister

        He hit 90 in his first inning of work, FWIW.

  • Mickey Scheister

    Alright, DFA Nuno now.

    • Mickey Scheister

      After getting outta the jam, they can re-sign him.

  • Winter

    That’s not a “Let’s go Astros” chant, is it?

    • Robinson Tilapia

      You’d need actual Astro fans for that.

  • Robinson Tilapia

    Remember the good old days, when people came here and fought over menstruation and use of the word “teh” over three separate threads? Ah, those were the days.

    • Mickey Scheister

      Where is Ted, is he on the DL too?

      • Robinson Tilapia

        I’m actually surprised he’s been gone this long. Didn’t think the chap had it in him to stay away this long.

        • Mickey Scheister

          It seemed very amicable round these here parts, I’m sure he’ll be back. Like Lyle Overbay’s herpes, they always come back.

  • jdp

    Too bad the hockey playoffs don’t start until tomorrow. This would have been a perfect night to change the channel.

  • I’mVernonI’mVernon4U

    I’m just glad this game came after the confidence poll….

  • Dalek Jeter

    So, in the last 40 minutes I wrote an 800 word profile on my Grandmother’s life strictly from memories, and may have embellished my late grandfather’s military record. Evil? Morally reprehensible?

    • Improbable Island’s Dirty Midget Whores (formerly RRR)

      It’s definitely not going in your resume, at least.

  • JLC 776

    Fuck it dude, let’s go bowling.

    • Wheels

      :)

  • Mickey Scheister

    Nunez needs to remove his head from his ass, he’s been putrid this year thus far.

  • Mick taylor

    Andy did not look his normal self. Have to blame romine for his framing pitches and his pitch calling. Adam Warren sucks. There has to be a better relief pitcher out there. He does not throw hard or have an out pitch. Cashman likes him , however.

    • jdp

      Yeah, if Saint Francisco de Cervelli had caught this game we’d of beat them bums.

  • brian

    Nunez straight up embarrassing all the Yankee fans who are determined to see Jeter not come back and play shortstop

    Jesus Nunie… these fans are big enough idiots as it is… stop making it worse