The Declaration of Tabloid Independence

Getting to know your new backup catcher
Game 27: Death by southpaw

When in the Course of baseball events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the hyperlinked bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of The Game and of Baseball’s Gods entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold this truth to be self-evident, that all fans are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are truth, logic, and the pursuit of further knowledge.

That to secure these rights, publications are distributed among men and women, deriving their just powers from the consent of the readers, That whenever any publication becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new publications, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Knowledge and Sanity. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that publications long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that readers are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such publications, and to provide new Guards for their future enjoyment.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these readers; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former publications. The histories of the New York Post and Daily News are histories of repeated irrational thoughts and fallacies, all having in direct object the dumbing down of fanbases. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Let it be known that from this day forward, with the few exceptions to be noted, RAB will no longer acknowledge the bodies of work created by New York tabloids. We take this stand in the name of sanity for all Yankees fans, and further for all who enjoy the game of baseball.

Every day, these publications assail our better senses and bring us little in the way of opinion and insight. We are constantly bombarded with fabricated rumors, flimsy analysis, and half-baked opinions that do not pass muster to the educated fan.

So, in the interest of saving our readers time and anguish, we will forego even making mention of these publications. However, in the further interest of providing our readers with the most comprehensive view of the New York Yankees, we include the following exclusions:

  1. Blog posts from Daily News beat writer Mark Feinsand, which contain factual statements which may be of interest to RAB readers.
  2. Updates on the new stadium which happen to be exclusive to a tabloid publication.

As the nature of scoops has changed, so has our dependence on traditional outlets. What appears one place may appear in many within minutes. This gives us a greater body of source work on which to base our stories. So we can, from this point forward, simply ignore the works which we consider insulting to our and our readers’ intelligences.

Update: For clarity, this applies to the NY Post and the non-Feinsand portion of the Daily News. Pete Abraham does not write for a tabloid, and is under no fire here.

Getting to know your new backup catcher
Game 27: Death by southpaw
  • Joey

    go get ’em guys! (BTW, very nice job, love how the intro is included, most people forget it)

  • samiamsports

    Its a good thing I have my Handy dandy Websters dictionary with me , cause that post had more fancy words that the declaration of independence itself. After about ten minutes of deciphering what you actually were saying. I am with you on every point. Those publications have the same cred in my eyes than the National Enquirer. I looking forward to a more Pure RAB in the future.

  • Sean McNally

    But where, oh where will I get my “Roger Clemens is a steroid user and possibly a pedophile” news from?

    • Mike A.

      We are proud to say that RAB will also be pedophile free. Unless, of course, those rumors about Kevin Youkilis and Dustin Pedroia turn out to be true…

  • Dave P.

    To quote Lee Greenwood…..
    “And I’ll glady stand up….next to you…and defend her still today…Cause there ain’t no doubt. I love this land….God Bless the U.S.A…….”

  • Wiggum Fan

    You might want to remove the Post and Daily news links under “Baseball Writers Blogs.”

    • Joseph P.

      Good point. Post removed. Daily News will stay, for the reason cited above. That is, unless popular opinion is to remove it.

  • Mark Feinsand

    Fellas … I won’t say I agree with your take on my paper, but I appreciate the vote of confidence for my blog and my work.

    • Adam

      if this is real, that is awesome.

  • dan

    I’m confused…. does this exclusion include (paradox?) the Times and/or other well-respected news sources like Pete Abraham’s articles/blog posts? Or is it just excluding the Daily News and the Post?

    • Ben K.

      When we say tabloids, we mean the Daily News – excluding Mark – and the Post. There are a few other writers we don’t particularly enjoy around here, but for the sake of this message, it’s the sensationalistic coverage of these two dailies.

  • EJ

    No list of grievances?

    • Joseph P.

      All the bandwidth in the world couldn’t handle our list of grievances.

  • It’sMeSNITCHES!!!

    Excellent idea. I hope others follow in your footsteps.

  • It’sMeSNITCHES!!!

    I hope others follow in your footsteps. Excellent idea.

  • It’sMeSNITCHES!!!

    ^ my apologies – computer fart

  • JC

    Although I have no say, I propose an amendment to allow the use of Pete Abraham’s blog. Pete is a smart writer and a true Yankee fan. Other then that, Long Live RAB.

    • It’sMeSNITCHES!!!

      Peter doesn’t write for a tabloid.

    • Adam

      pete isn’t a yankee fan. he writes for the yankees. read some of his stuff, you’ll see there is a difference.

  • Pingback: River Ave. Blues | Game 27: Death by southpaw

  • Rupert Murdoch

    How dare you! I will crush you and your pathetic little blog! Joel Sherman and George King are coming for you!

    • It’sMeSNITCHES!!!

      I love how The Simpsons continually trashes Rupert. It’s priceless!!! F Rupert.

  • RGK

    Maybe it is largely due to reading blogs almost every day, but the quality of local sports writing appears to me to be substandard IMHO. I am amazed (maybe it is my imagination) by the ratio of negative to positive stories put out by the (NY) print media. That does not even cover the items mentioned in your post. In any case, I agree with your decision. The nature of sports information is changing for the better.

  • Dylan

    Yeah but when I pick up the Post I also get to see Spitzer’s hooker on the front cover, months after the story broke!!!1! Can we put up a photo of drunk Britney on the page somewhere so I can make the transition?!

  • eddyb

    too bad the Colonies couldn’t have made an exception in their declaration for some things haha. But really, one of the more enjoyable things I’ve read on sports in some time… well done!

  • Lanny

    I dont see the problem with the tabloids. They are enjoyable to read.

    • Victoria

      yes, if you like never knowing whether what you’re reading has some basis in truth or absolutely none

  • mg

    Let me just toss my John Hancock under that. I’m fully on board.

  • YankeeGM

    Motion Seconded…

    Well put!

  • Lou

    AMEN to that, if i may invoke religion in this secular declaration.

  • Pingback: Second Ave. Sagas | Blogging the NYC Subways » Blog Archive » Fearmongering from the Post on the SAS

  • Pingback: An A-Rod-inspired anti-tabloid rant | River Avenue Blues