Aug
30

Clemens pleads not guilty to perjury, obstruction charges

By

Roger Clemens appeared this morning in federal court in the District of Columbia to enter a plea of not guilty to charges of perjury and obstruction of Congress. Clemens is facing a six-count indictment concerning statements he made in February 2008 in front of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform. The Department of Justice and Congress believes Clemens lied under oath, and like it or not, the case against Clemens will partially rest on Andy Pettitte’s shoulders. Clemens, who left DC to participate in a golf tournament at Myrtle Beach this afternoon, has already rejected a plea deal and plans to fight the indictment. This case, however, won’t go to trial for a few years, and Clemens will stay in legal limbo until then.

Categories : Asides, STEROIDS!
  • bonestock94

    I believe him. *cough*

  • Gonzo

    I hope he plans on going with the Chewbacca defense or else he’s screwed.

    • ROBTEN

      It’s more likely that they’ll continue trying to plea-bargain the case out. I can’t speak as a lawyer, but, having briefly studied eye-witness testimony, it seems to me that as long as the case remains based entirely on the combined testimony of Pettitte and McNamee, it’s probably in Clemens’ best interest to fight the case. Although television likes to put a lot of weight on “eye-witnesses,” the problem is that eye-witnesses are not very reliable and the more time that passes between the events and a trial the easier it is create doubt in the mind of a jury about the veracity of the eye-witness.

      • Gonzo

        Yeah but if Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must aquit!

        • Thomas

          Unfortunately for Clemens, Chewbacca lives on Kashyyk (a.k.a. Wookie Planet C). I know this, because I’ve seen portions of The Star Wars Holiday Special.

          • http://www.twitter.com/jordan_smed JGS

            As have I. Unfortunately, this, as xkcd so often is, is spot on.

          • Poopy Pants

            BUT do any of you have the Star Wars Christmas Album???

            ???

            ???

    • jsbrendog (returns)

      it doeth not make thenth.

  • Andy In Sunny Daytona

    It’s not a lie if you believe it.

    • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

      So I started to walk into the water. I won’t lie to you boys, I was terrified! But I pressed on and as I made my way passed the breakers a strange calm came over me. I don’t know if it was divine intervention or the kinship of all living things, but I tell you, Jerry, at that moment, I *was* a marine biologist.

      • Thomas

        My favorite episode.

        • A.D.

          One of the great monologues

  • Chris

    In the (apparently unlikely) event that Clemens is acquitted of these charges, is there anyone that would actually believe that he did not take steroids?

    • A.D.

      I’m pretty sure he’s guilty in the court of public opinion forever, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if he does get out of this one.

  • ROBTEN

    As long as the owners are not called to accountability for their role in the steroid era (among other things), the cases against Bonds, Clemens and the dragging of players in front of congress are little more than political theatre that ultimately has almost no value in terms of the future of the sport except to further the image of the “greedy” players who “cheat” to get ahead. Meanwhile, the owners go on hiding behind the narrative that they “didn’t know anything” about steroids while gaining ammunition to use against players in the next CBA negotiations (and getting endless tax breaks and other perks to build their new stadiums).

    If the players are going to be called to account — and it’s questionable whether or not it requires the kinds of inquiry that are going on now — then the owners and Selig need to be as well.

    • A.D.

      Well perjury is something that they should always go after people for, the reason Clemens was in front of congress & under oath is something that I still fail to understand why the government is involved.

  • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder
  • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

    The only reason the feds are going after Roger Clemens like this is because of racism.

    If Roger and I weren’t white, they’d let us off the hook.

    Sincerely,
    Sammy Sosa

    • jsbrendog (returns)

      barry bonds is pissed this is ruining his racism defense

  • vinny-b

    of course Roger, you’re never guilty of anything.

    _

  • Jose the Satirist

    I’d love to see a study done on how much taxpayer money is being spent on these proceedings.

    • IOI

      Perjury is perjury. You want they should ignore his crimes because trials cost money?

      • Thomas

        Yeah, perjury is a crime. However, the hearing in which Clemens allegedly lie under oath was a waste of money to begin with. Their would be no crime and need for a trial, if not for a stupid and costly hearing that accomplished nothing.

        • CS Yankee

          Most senators do far worse but when they are caught they are usually wise enough to cry, apoligize and try and rebuild their image/careers.

          Clemens and his lawyer had personal close door meetings with cabinet members and got on a soap box to declare his outrage of being accused by former Senator Mitchell.

          Bottom line:
          1) Clemens and his lawyer define the Texas sterotype of being “ego-idiots”
          2) Senators will use any floor to make a name and get votes.
          3) The players took all the risk, got a small percentage of the reward and were the only ones targeted in the probe.
          4) MLB revenues/profits grew at extreme levels while avoiding all accountability.

          • http://www.secondavenuesagas.com Benjamin Kabak

            Not to be that guy, but the poli sci major in me wants to tell you that the House representatives and not Senators are ones on their soapboxes here.

            /sorry

            • CS Yankee

              I sit corrected.

              “…happily ever after fails and we been poisioned by these fairytales, lawyer’s dwell on small details, saying daddy had to lie”

              /donhenley’d

      • Jose the Satirist

        Where did I say that? Anyone accused of lying under oath should face trial. I’d just love to see if the amount spent is ginormous compared to other perjury trials with less publicity.

    • Hughesus Christo

      High-profile illegal drug operations flowing through a multi-billion dollar industry supported by an antitrust exemption. Why would they investigate that?

      • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

        That. Baseball gets scrutinized at a higher level than other sports because baseball has a unique federal antitrust exemption.

        • Jose the Satirist

          I understand. But is it so wrong of me to wonder exactly how much money is being spent on investigations related to the exemption?

          • http://www.secondavenuesagas.com Benjamin Kabak

            Wrong? No. But the amount of money being spent by Congress on baseball’s antitrust exemption pales in comparison to just about any other example of wasteful federal spending you could find.

            Considering how much taxable revenue baseball generates for the US, Congress is going to, every few years, stick its nose in baseball’s business. That’s just the way it is.

            • ROBTEN

              Congress is going to, every few years, stick its nose in baseball’s business. That’s just the way it is.

              Which would be fine, and, in fact, warranted given the anti-trust exemption, but the problem in relation to issues of cost for me is that it’s being used to investigate such a small part of the problem (certain “big name” players), rather than the entire business, owners included. In other words, be serious and complete in your investigation or don’t do it at all. Singling out a few players accomplishes very little in regards to PEDs in sports.

          • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

            I understand. But is it so wrong of me to wonder exactly how much money is being spent on investigations related to the exemption?

            No, not at all. My answer, without looking at any of the books or any shred of federal budgets or moneys:

            Probably less than a ten-thousandth of a percent of the federal budget (which is massive).

            How much money do you think a hearing like that costs? Couple of thousand bucks? What about the salaries of the federal investigators who questioned McNamee/Pettitte/etc? A few dozen man-hours, maybe a hundred tops? Probably not that much.

            The Feds didn’t bankroll the cost of the Mitchell Report, they just took the findings and the info from BALCO and other ongoing investigations and called some people in to do depositions and give some testimony. The investigation has only been mildly thorough to this point. I can’t imagine the taxpayer cost of the whole thing, from start to finish, is any type of exorbitantly large amount.

            But I’m just guesstimating, maybe I’m wrong.

  • http://mystiqueandaura.com Steve H

    When the Mitchell Report came out public opinion was that it was 100% accurate (save for people defending Brian Roberts) and that if anyone wanted to prove their innocence they would sue. Of course the whole premise behind media members saying that was that no one was going to sue, therefore proving their guilt. Then Clemens sued and the media threw out there “they must sue to prove their innocence argument!”. Clemens should have just said the public has convicted me and all I can do is say I never used steroids. And just stopped while he was ahead.

  • Hughesus Christo

    I’m missing the “STEROIDS!!!!!!” tag.

    • http://www.secondavenuesagas.com Benjamin Kabak

      From above: Categories : Asides, STEROIDS!

      • Hughesus Christo

        I really Cervelli’d that one.

        • jsbrendog (returns)

          ietc

  • http://twitter.com/simmonsclass Sam

    “Federal agents mad cause I’m flagrant, tapped my cell and the phone in the basement”-Roger Clemens

    • http://twitter.com/tsjc68 tommiesmithjohncarlos a/k/a Ridiculous Upside the Elder

      I laughed.

    • BadaBling

      My (legal) team supreme..

  • Poopy Pants

    “Roger is too pretty to go to jail.”
    - John McCain